Yes. The stage in my life is strange. And you know the status even if you read this for the first time. So am not gonna tell you, what is going on. All I am going to say is it's hard and it's difficult to live with a mind, full of mood swings and story's. But I rather have this then, false believe that everything is OK. I would rather put my self through misery and pain then live in a believe that nothing can't get to me. And I am doing that. Why because when it's all over, I will understand it better. I want to get in and out of this thing, explore it the way that nobody wants to. I want to experience everything in life. That is going to be hard, but I am starting where people don't want to. I mention my mind. I think it's different. That doesn't make me better in any kind a way. It just different. I watch movies that some of you will never heard of, I visit ted.com daily and listen to what some great minds have to say, when I woke up in the morning I like to read the news, even if it's not good, I actually read the paper. I love to run, just run for no reason at all, I love to be alone, not a lot of people understand that, I love people that appreciate silence, I love people that have a passion and they like to talk about it, I love a good listener, I love people that are not afraid of being wrong, I love punctuality, I love the sense of urgency, I love the sound of a guitar, I love the sound of a piano, I love a good voice of a singer in a band, I love music, I love the 70's rock, I love romance, I love creativity, I love dancing and I love to write. I love a good performance. I love a woman with needs, I love a woman that doesn't like to play games, I love a woman that could make her own decisions regard the topic.
You know what I don't think that I am different. I think the difference, right now I hate that word, is that I process in my own way. I love the speculation in my brain. No stuff is better then your own. I made it my own. I like it untouched. I like it raw. For some undisclosed reason I love the sky that am under. Most of the time it's cloudy and rainy, but it's awesome. It's mine.
I love a hundred other things, my attention was not to tell those things. Am not shore what my attention is. All I know, I don't want to be average. Above, less average that is a judgement call. Sometimes happiness has to be earned and sometimes... you have to learn to love what is good for you. I don't want to force things. I only force words, they need to come out, no matter the outcome. The other stuff those will happen, if not so be it.
Miha
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